It's official, I'm fat
Okay, so I went to my doctor's appointment this morning before work. It was a hectic morning, waking up late. We didn't have any milk so I ate a Luna bar for breakfast in the car. At least it was healthy. I usually eat cereal. Robert and I had to drive separate cars to the doc's because it's close to where he works but not where I work, so that was also a pain.
Anyway, so okay, I didn't gain ten pounds in a month.
I GAINED NINE. I'm so ashamed. I just wanted to crawl under a rock. But I realize now that I would not have fit under a rock. So the nurse weighs me and makes all these "Oh, my God" noises about how much weight I've gained and is everything okay and blah, blah, fucking blah. I already knew I gained a lot of weight, I just wasn't quite ready to hear nine pounds. So that puts me in a bad mood, and we weight (oops, I mean wait) at least a half hour for the doc to come in. He tells me everything was fine with my glucose tolerance test. My blood pressure and everything else is fine. Then he too sees my weight and can't believe it either. I'm like, jeez, am I the worst pregnant lady they've ever seen in their office? Is nine pounds really that bad? At least he wasn't too preachy about it. All he said was that if I gain a lot of weight it will be hard to lose after the baby's born. It doesn't take a genius to figure that one out, doc. When he looked at my weight he said, "nine pounds! Now that took some effort!" It didn't really. I just ate lots of Doritos and ice cream and conveniently forgot to walk on the treadmill. He's such a punk, that doctor. He actually asked me if my appetite was okay. He asked me in all seriousness. I was, like, are you joking? I just gained nine pounds!
We did ask the doctor if we could take a trip somewhere in the last trimester, and he said it shouldn't be a problem, just not to be going to any remote places where there are no hospitals around for miles. Yeah, thanks, that never crossed my mind. He also said the carpal tunnel is common in pregnant women, which I had deduced on my own by reading about fellow bloggers' carpal woes. Mine is only bad when I wake up in the morning. Hopefully it doesn't become unbearable. It's already a nuisance. Um, what else, he said that the hospital where we'll be having the baby allows the babies to sleep in the mom's hospital room, assuming everything is normal. This made me very happy. I was hoping to be able to do this.
Since we overslept this morning I ended up wearing these maternity capri jeans because I couldn't find one of my three pairs of maternity pants that I reserve for work. I spent lots of time in vain frantically throwing clothes out of the laundry basket looking for my capri khakis. So yeah, I wore capri jeans to work. These Old Navy capri jeans with a really wimpy panel and let's face it -- I've outgrown the damn things. So because these jeans are really small, they kept slipping down and I had to keep pulling my shirt down to hide my belly and keep it from peeking out at the world. Let's just say that I didn't feel very beautiful today at work. I looked like a pregnant slob. And I felt like a pregnant blob after that weigh in.
So 30 pounds so far, and I'm only 31 weeks. This can't be good. I ate a salad from McDonald's for lunch. But tomorrow I fear I will be eating pizza because one of our coworkers is leaving and that's where her going-away is. I will be forced to eat pizza and pepperoni rolls. What's a girl to do?
Anyway, on a more positive note, I may be being considered for a job at work. A job with a different company. It would be really cool if I could swing that, but I won't get any hopes up. It seems like everytime I think I have a shot at a job, I'm disappointed over some reason or another and it just doesn't pan out. Hopefully this one will and I'll get paid lots of money, and they'll let me start after the baby's born (two to three months after), and I will miraculously lose all this weight after baby's born, and everything will be peachy. A girl can dream, can't she?